Regular day? Games and models.

 Howdeee!

Ok, on April 18th's Facebook post I put forth the notion that it was time for me to review my goals. This has left me a bit aimless. That place of indecision makes me very uncomfortable. Start from scratch, sure no problem, double efforts and focus, ok I will give it a try. It is that place in between that really creates stress and misery for me.

The model of the world that I was using when I set up those goals was incomplete. The rules, rewards, and penalties were unclear. When trying to apply a sloppy model to the real world, without understanding the rules, tracking the rewards and penalties the game quickly becomes nothing but moving pieces around without knowing the consequences and you relay on pure luck to make progress. In the game of tic tac toe, you start with nine choices, all fairly equal. Then someone else has control with eight choices most are fairly equal. Each move takes away the number of choices and the number of good choices. Most bad moves are easily avoided. Tic tac toe is the most fun when you are first learning it, two seasoned players rarely play because they are both confident of the outcome, producing a game that is no longer fun to play.

WWW (What went wrong) When I chose my goals I had no clue of the landscape of the game (the board), no Idea when it was my turn, no way to keep score, I could continue the analogy but I am confident you have the picture. So now that I have attempted a round of the game and found myself way over my head the real decision becomes was this game worth playing?

Ran this one by Copilot here is the response:

Howdy! It sounds like you’re in a reflective phase, reassessing your goals and the framework you’ve been using to achieve them. It’s natural to feel a bit lost during such times, but it’s also an opportunity for growth and learning.

Your analogy with tic-tac-toe is quite insightful. It illustrates how a simple game can become complex and less enjoyable when the rules aren’t clear or when the outcome becomes predictable. Similarly, setting goals without a clear understanding of the “game” can lead to confusion and a lack of direction.

Here’s a suggestion on how to approach this situation:

1. Re-evaluate Your Goals: Take a step back and look at your goals. Are they still relevant to you? Do they align with your values and what you want to achieve in life?
2. Understand the Rules: Just like in any game, knowing the rules is crucial. In life, this could mean understanding what’s within your control, the potential obstacles, and the resources you have at your disposal.
3. Track Progress: Keeping score helps you know where you stand. Find a way to measure your progress towards your goals, whether it’s through milestones, deadlines, or other metrics.
4. Adapt and Learn: If you find yourself “over your head,” it’s okay to adjust your strategies. Learn from what didn’t work and try different approaches.

Remember, it’s not just about the end result but also about the journey. Each step, whether forward or backward, is a learning opportunity. And sometimes, the game is indeed worth playing, not for the outcome, but for the experiences and growth it brings.

If you’re feeling stuck, perhaps a fresh perspective or a new set of goals can reignite your motivation. Consider what aspects of your goals were fulfilling and which were not. This can guide you in crafting a new set of objectives that are both challenging and rewarding.

Continued: 04/26/2024 - Facebook is my dumping ground basically a warm up exercise, but once in a while a gem is in there. 

Good day to you.

Today I am circling back to the core problem that I am having. It is the question that one of my mentors pointed out yesterday. He worded it very differently but the real question he asked me was

"What do I want".

In that moment I was unable to answer that question. Now, after a good nights sleep, a few cups of coffee, and no pressure I realized the source of about half of my problem. My real answer:

"I have no earthly idea of what I want".

I can only bring back the tic tac toe analogy. Part of what I want is a more interesting game. That brings into light a whole different approach to figuring out what I want. I have found one thing that I do not want, maybe there are a lot of other things that I don't want. Once I eliminate most of those, it might show me what I do want.

    If I ever do buckle down an actually write the Regular day book, this is going to be a part of it. That moment when you realize you have been playing tic tac toe too long might be that point where you focus on another game. At this point I don't even know what the board is going to look like, who the other players are, rules, rewards, penalties. Tic tac toe will barely keep a roof over my head. Will the other player let me in?

Copilot often gives really good insight, I went ahead and reran the above and this is it's response.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and the insightful analogy of tic-tac-toe. It’s fascinating how even seemingly simple games can mirror life’s complexities.

Now, let’s delve into your recent realization about the core problem: “What do I want?” It’s a profound question—one that often leads us to the heart of our desires and motivations.

The Quest for Clarity

When faced with this question, it’s common to feel a bit lost. After all, our wants and needs can be elusive, shifting like shadows. But fear not; you’re not alone in this exploration. Many of us grapple with defining our true desires.

The Power of Reflection

Your mentor’s inquiry—“What do I want?”—is like a compass pointing toward self-discovery. It’s a call to pause, reflect, and uncover the layers beneath our surface desires. Sometimes, we’re so busy chasing external goals that we forget to check our internal compass.

The Revelation

Your honest answer—“I have…”—holds immense significance. It acknowledges that there’s more to explore. It’s an invitation to dive deeper, to uncover the hidden gems within your heart and mind.

A Few Steps Forward

1. Curiosity: Approach this question with curiosity. What stirs your soul? What ignites your passion? What brings you joy?
2. Dreams and Whispers: Listen to your dreams, those quiet whispers that surface when the world is still. They often reveal our deepest longings.
3. Values and Priorities: Consider your core values. What truly matters to you? Align your desires with these guiding principles.
4. Experiment: Try on different wants like trying on clothes. See how they fit. Some may feel snug; others might need tailoring.

The Journey Continues

Remember, clarity isn’t a destination; it’s a journey. As you sip your coffee and ponder, know that each revelation brings you closer to understanding what truly matters.

And yes, sometimes the game is worth playing—even if the rules shift, the board changes, and the outcome remains uncertain. Because in the end, it’s about the experiences, the growth, and the joy of playing.

May your quest for clarity lead you to unexpected treasures. 🌟✨